Friends of Carlos

PREAMBLE

We, the undersigned, in order to seal our friendship with Carlos Brocatto for all eternity, raise the forenamed to the status of Demon Incarnate, and shall be known henceforth as the Friends of Carlos, or Carlotic Enthusiasts, or Carlomancers, or any variation thereof. The articles of affirmation here set forth describe our constitution.

ARTICLE I - NATURE OF THE BEAST

From the soundless depths of the bottomless pit, in the midst of ontological anarchy, we affirm against all hope that the Demon Carlos, or the Carlos, exists everywhere at all times, past, present, and future; that he is, was, and always shall be sovereign; and that, knowingly or unknowingly, the purpose of all other beings throughout history, named and unnamed, terminates in the fruition of his demonic will.

ARTICLE II - HUMAN PARTS

We affirm that Carlos Brocatto, born into this world as flesh and blood, is the living idol of the Carlos; that we, the Friends of Carlos, are his lesser avatars; and that, wherever we may find ourselves on the face of the earth, we act in concert to manifest his demonic will.

ARTICLE III - NO-ESCAPE CLAUSE

We affirm that, in sequel to the pledge of friendship, there is absolutely no going back; that the appearance of conflict between any human parts signals nothing more than a demonic shift in posture; and that the vector of demonic will shall always prevail as the summation of any conflict whatsoever.

ARTICLE IV - INVOCATION

We affirm that the invocation of the Carlos is justified in proportion to its recurrence, and that invocation strengthens his presence among us.